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"This is your Life.....Vegeta "Written By: Debs-dragon & SSjMatty Disclaimer: We don't own The DBZ crew a rich Japanese person does. We don't own the T.V. show 'This is your Life' either. We are just borrowing them all and making up our own brand of insane humour. No money being made here, don't sue as neither one of us has anything worthwhile, unless you want my dog. :) Rating: PG 13. Contains some violence and language. Notes: Again Matty and I were conversing and the idea of Vegetas past life being on display came to mind. Soon after this ficcy was born. The corny one liner's you can blame on Matt, the rest you can blame on me >_<
"This is your Life.... Vegeta"
Part 5... The cleaners removed themselves from the studio floor and Mike once again took up his position with the microphone. "Well I guess we won't be able to chat anymore with our guests that couldn't make it." said Mike. "Good riddance I say. Didn't need to hear their useless gossip anyway." huffed Vegeta. Bulma gave him a glare. "Thats not a nice thing to say Vegeta. I thought they were your friends." "If you call them friends I hate to see what you classify as enemies then." Vegeta sneered. Bulma folded her arms and sank back into her seat. It was pointless to argue with the man when he was in this frame of mind. Mike stared at the pair and deciding they had finished their squabble for now continued.... "So after meeting up with Goku and the others on the planet Namek in another search for the fabled Dragonballs you finally saw the error of your ways and converted to the good side." "Error of my ways? You got that wrong buddy." smirked Vegeta. "But I was under the impression that you joined forces with Goku and the others to defeat the evil Frieza." said Mike. "In a manner of speaking I did. I thought that I could use Kakarott and his cronies to defeat Frieza and then take the Dragonballs for myself." replied Vegeta. "There was only one slight problem with that." offered Goku. Vegeta sent Goku a death glare. "Oh and what may that have been?" asked Mike. "Well Frieza just happened to kill Vegeta." sniggered Goku. Audience: *Gasp* "I didn't feel dead." said Vegeta. "Well you were. I buried you with my own two hands." said Goku. "So it was you that heaped all that rock and rubble on me! You any idea how hard it was to claw my way out of that stuff? Not to mention the stains it put in my spandex!" "You should be grateful we wished you back to life." huffed Goku. "And what do I see when I finally manage to break free of the garden bed? A golden haired goody two shoes who still hasn't beaten the stuffing out of the reptile." responded Vegeta. "Yeah well you weren't in any shape to help you know." "Help?... Help... I didn't even get the chance to throw a ki blast. One minute I was there about to fire and then *Poof* Im on some mud ball you called home!" "Yeah and then if that wasn't enough he goes off tearing around the universe looking for you and then finally returns and expects me to put him up." injected Bulma. "My god it took me a week to get the god awful smell out of the bathroom and the washing machine never worked properly again!" "I never asked for your help woman!" Vegeta stormed. "But you sure as hell took it though!" retorted Bulma. "If I may interrupt here people, I need to remind you we are on a time schedule." said Mike. The three warring parties obligingly shut up and opted instead to send silent glares at each other. "Not long after your return to earth you found yourself in the desert once more facing Frieza." "Trust mister perfect to leave a job half done." muttered Vegeta darkly. "How was I to know he would survive?" humphed Goku. "You should have killed him when you had the chance." came the reply. * Whizz... Bang..... Flurp....POOF .....* The noise radiated through the studio along with a cloud of grey smoke..... "Cough ... cough.... What the hell?" *Whack* "Vegeta mind your language." admonished Bulma. The smoke cleared and a funny machine stood in the centre of the studio floor. With a hiss the top popped open and a purple haired youth jumped down waving to the crowd. Several girls in the audience fainted. Vegeta groaned. "Not you again." "Well hello and nice to see you again too father." said Future Trunks. Bulma raised herself from her seat and moved across the studio floor to envelop the youth in a warm embrace. "My baby... How nice to see you again." "Awww cut it out mom. Your embarrassing me." "Yeah leave the kid alone before you turn him into a complete wimp." scowled Vegeta. "Cough... cough... If I may continue." said Mike. "Yeah get on with this farce... all this lovey dovey stuff is beginning to make me sick." Frieza said. "So it was in the desert that Frieza was finally cut down to size and Goku made his return. All of you were anxious to know who this person with the ominous warning was but alas only Goku was to learn of the boy's identity." continued Mike. "Piccolo knew too." added Goku. "Can't forget big ears now can we?" snickered Vegeta. Goku just glared. "So it was then that Goku learnt that you would finally settle down and become a father, with no less than Bulma as your wife, and produce an heir." said Mike. Vegeta laughed. "Well thats wrong for a start." "Huh? It can't be wrong, my researchers have done a thorough job." "The evidence is right here before you Vegeta." added Bulma as she waved her hand at Trunks. "I agree I produced an heir... but I did not take that woman as my wife." smirked Vegeta. Goku scratched his head... "Then that means..... Oh my..." Bulma blushed bright red, Goku stared at the floor, Trunks gazed around, Radditz looked suitably shocked, Frieza snickered and Mike looked like he was about to choke. "Well ummm..... Lets just keep moving along here. With the current Trunks still too young to bring in with you tonight we sought to have the future Trunks come in and speak on behalf of his younger self and enlighten us to his relationship with his father while growing up." Mike turned and addressed future Trunks. "Making several visits back in time as your father no longer exists in your time line you were able to observe your father as he interacted with your younger self in this time line. Can you give us an insight into the type of relationship that is shared here?" "Well I don't really know all that much but he wasn't around a lot during my baby years. Mom was the one that seemed to be always doing stuff for me." said Trunks. "Once he knew I was pregnant he did what every other male of the species seemed to do..... he ran away." said Bulma angrily. "He left to go off training somewhere in the galaxy or so he said and I had to try to cope all by myself. It isn't easy being a single mum you know." "So you never played a part in Trunks' baby years then Vegeta?" said Goku. "You don't know what you were missing." "If you thought I was going to stay around with a messy crying whining brat and a baby that was demanding to be fed and changed all the time you got another thing coming." Vegeta sneered. Goku thought for a moment. "Good point." "I never once asked you to help me Vegeta although it wouldn't have hurt you to change a nappy once in a while." "Thats why you were the mother. Warriors don't do that sort of thing." "So you just upped and left rather that change nappies?" Radditz piped up. "Can't say I blame you." "No one is asking your opinion you overgrown hippie." snarled Bulma. "But Vegeta came back didn't he? I mean he was there when we faced up to the threat that Trunks had warned us about." Goku put in "I had to come back. If I hadn't then that woman would have turned Trunks into a pansy." growled Vegeta. "She was always babying him. He needed a man around... someone to toughen him up, train him, make him strong." "Ohh theres something about a man with muscles....." said Radditz dreamily. Everyone's mouths hit the floor with audible thumps. "What?... Why are you all looking at me that way?" said Radditz. Choosing to ignore Radditz Vegeta continued. "I trained him to become a strong warrior like myself." "But he's only a kid Vegeta, he has yet to reach his 11th birthday." said Bulma. "I hate to tell you this father but I turned out a reasonable fighter." added future Trunks. "But this is this time line. Not yours and I will not have a son of mine becoming a weakling. Besides one of the family has to beat Kakarotts and we did that at the last world tournament." snickered Vegeta. "I still say that was rigged. Goten told me a few things about that fight." said Goku. "Whatever, but Trunks beat your son and I say your a sore loser. At least this Trunks wont grow up to be a pansy." Bulma thought now would be a good time to add her two cents to the mix. "Well future Trunks looks pretty strong to me. Take a look out there at the Internet Vegeta, he has hundreds of sites devoted just to him, all done by girls who are head over heels for him. Everywhere he goes girls swoon over him. Just look at the number that fainted when he arrived." "Just because he has a fan club of giggling girls doesn't mean he's not a wimp. It takes more than strength to be a warrior, you need brains as well, you can't rush home to mommy every time the going gets tough. Besides have you ever seen him with a girl?" sneered Vegeta. Radditz looked across to Trunks and licked his lips. "Is that so?" he cooed. Trunks hastily took a few steps back. "Errr Radditz the only reason I haven't been seen with a girl is cause I don't have time for one. I spend too much time training to even think about finding a girlfriend." "Always the shy ones..." murmured Radditz Trunks decided that maybe now would be a good time to hide behind Mike. Feeling that things were beginning to get a little out of hand Mike continued with his monologue. "So Vegeta you took it upon yourself to oversee Trunks' training and development into a strong fighter." "Damm straight!" said Vegeta and stared Radditz in the eye. "Getting back to the warning Trunks had brought you all you knew there was an evil force on its way and so you left the earth to continue your training in space." said Mike. "Yeah well there is only so much you can do on this piddling little planet. I needed more than just that machine she built, I needed to drive myself to the limit, push myself to the barrier and beyond...." "Just face it Vegeta you were jealous that I turned Super saiya-jin before you did." snickered Goku. "I knew I could achieve it as well." huffed Vegeta. "But it took a s**t load of meteors to do it." "Who cares? At least I made it." returned Vegeta. Mike thought that now would be a good time to take a commercial break and try to regain some sort of control over the show. ~ T B C ~ Radditz: "This isn't fair." Deb: "What isn't fair?" Radditz: "You guy's keep teasing me like this." Matty: "Hey don't blame me she's the one with the evil mind." Deb: "Whistles... Who me?" Matty: "I only help with the story line, she puts it all together." Deb: "Just trying to please the fans..." "Radditz: "What happened to pleasing the characters?" Deb: "You can answer that one Matt." Matt: "...."
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